School Anxiety in Children: Signs, Causes, and What to Do

My School Agent | 8 July 2026

Sunday evening. Your child complains their stomach hurts. No temperature. No sickness. Just a vague ache that appears like clockwork every week at 6pm.

Monday morning, the ache is worse. By Tuesday, they're in tears before breakfast. By Friday, they're fine. Then Sunday comes round again.

You're not imagining it. School anxiety is real, and it's more common than most parents realise.

How Common Is School Anxiety?

NHS data shows anxiety disorders affect around 8% of children aged 5 to 19 in the UK. But school-related anxiety specifically? That number is harder to pin down because it doesn't always show up as diagnosed anxiety.

What we do know is that persistent absence from school has risen sharply. The latest government figures show 18.14% of pupils were persistently absent in the 2023/24 academic year. That's nearly one in five children missing significant school time.

Not all of that is anxiety. But a lot of it is.

YoungMinds, the mental health charity, reports that school is now one of the top sources of stress for children. Academic pressure, social dynamics, sensory overload, fear of failure. It adds up.

Signs Your Child Might Be Anxious About School

Anxiety in children doesn't always look like anxiety in adults. They might not say "I feel anxious." Instead, you get:

Tummy aches or headaches, especially on school mornings
Trouble sleeping, particularly Sunday nights
Meltdowns or tantrums before school
Clinginess, not wanting you to leave at drop-off
Frequent calls from the school office saying they feel unwell
Withdrawal, not wanting to talk about school
Irritability or mood swings in the evening

The physical symptoms are real. Your child isn't faking the tummy ache. Anxiety triggers the body's stress response, which affects digestion. The pain is genuine, even if there's no physical illness.

What Causes School Anxiety?

Every child is different. But common triggers include:

Academic pressure. Tests, homework, fear of getting something wrong in front of the class. Even high-achieving children can feel this intensely.

Social worries. Friendships, falling out with friends, fear of being left out or teased. Lunchtime and break time can feel more stressful than lessons.

Sensory overload. Noisy classrooms, bright lights, crowded corridors. For some children, especially those with ADHD or autism, school is physically overwhelming.

Transitions. Starting a new school, moving up a year, changing teachers. Any change to routine can spike anxiety.

Separation anxiety. Particularly in younger children. The fear that something will happen to you while they're at school.

Something specific. A strict teacher, a bully, a subject they struggle with. Sometimes there's a clear trigger. Often there isn't.

What Actually Helps

There's no one-size-fits-all fix. But research and NHS guidance suggest these things make a difference:

Routine and predictability. Anxiety thrives on uncertainty. Knowing what's happening each day, week, and term reduces the mental load. A visible calendar with school events, PE days, and after-school clubs helps.

Validation, not dismissal. Don't say "You're fine, just go to school." Say "I know this feels hard. Let's work out what might help."

Small steps, not big leaps. If your child is avoiding school, gradual exposure works better than forcing them back full-time immediately. Start with an hour, then a morning, then a full day.

Talk to the school early. Teachers can't help if they don't know there's a problem. Most schools have pastoral support teams or SENCOs who can put adjustments in place.

Identify the specific worry. "What's the hardest part of the day?" Often it's not lessons. It's break time, or the walk to school, or getting changed for PE.

Teach simple calming techniques. Breathing exercises, counting to ten, a fidget toy in their pocket. These won't solve anxiety, but they can take the edge off in the moment.

Limit reassurance-seeking. It sounds counterintuitive, but constantly reassuring an anxious child can reinforce the anxiety. Answer the question once, calmly, then redirect.

When to Seek Professional Help

If school anxiety is affecting your child's daily life, it's worth speaking to your GP. They can refer you to CAMHS (Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services) or local support services.

You might also try:

School counselling services (many schools have access to these)
YoungMinds' free parent helpline
Charity-run workshops on managing child anxiety

Waiting lists for NHS mental health services are long. Sometimes very long. So start the conversation early, even if things aren't critical yet.

What Doesn't Help

Punishment. Bribes. Forcing them through the school gate while they're hysterical. These things might get your child into school that day, but they don't address the underlying anxiety. Often they make it worse.

Keeping them off school long-term without a plan also doesn't help. The longer the absence, the harder the return.

You're trying to find the middle ground. Acknowledge the anxiety. Work with the school. Build coping strategies. Keep them attending where possible, but with support in place.

The Sunday Evening Tummy Ache

If your child's stomach hurts every Sunday at 6pm, believe them. Then dig a bit deeper.

School anxiety doesn't mean your child is weak, or you've failed as a parent. It means something at school feels overwhelming, and they need help working through it.

Start with small changes. Routine, predictability, validation. Talk to the school. And if it's not improving, talk to your GP.

You're not alone in this. And neither is your child.

My School Agent helps reduce uncertainty by giving your family a clear view of what's happening each day and week. Routine and predictability help anxious children cope. Sometimes just knowing what's coming next is enough to take the edge off Sunday evening.